Been in a similar situation with my current boyfriend of 3 years.
I have a lot of guy friends who I talk to and thought I was close with. Every time something wrong happened in the relationship, I went to my guy friends for advice. They do flirt with me sexually but I just ignore it. My boyfriend found out and brought it up, and I felt uncomfortable and said it was nothing. Realizing what I did convinced me I was doing something wrong here.
I didn't want my boyfriend to feel insecure about how I felt about him. I didn't want him to feel that way at all, so if I could change it I would. Love is a mutual feeling, and if he feels uncomfortable with me talking to my guy friends like that about my problems and not going to my boyfriend first, what's the point in having a boyfriend if I'm not open to him?
I just distanced myself from all my close guy friends, because I came to realize the ones that "joke" sexually or really try to get in the middle between my boyfriend and I, are the ones that are trying to cradle rob my boyfriend. They're trying to get at me. Those are friends I cannot trust.
Of course there comes a tough decision where who comes first, friends or boyfriend? If they were my real friends, they would want me to be happy. If my boyfriend was good to me, he'd want me to be happy. My boyfriend tried to understand and let me be friends with those guys, but I made a decision on my own to cut them off. I realized what made me happy was my boyfriend. He gives me everything no one else can. I like my friends and all, but they all liked me intimately at one point. I don't want my boyfriend to have that type of insecurity with the people around me. I just want what's best for him.
You need to tell her how you feel and how relationships deserve honesty and truth. Ask her, what's the point of being her boyfriend if she can't talk about her problems with you? Even if it does concern your relationship, that's a better reason to consult you, and you only.
What me and my boyfriend have, it's between us only. We don't talk about our relationship with anyone else, even if there is problems because we'd rather solve it ourselves first.
Breaking up with her is being too hasty. If you really are serious about her and think you love her, give her a chance to see if she can realize what makes her happy, you or her friends. If she doesn't know, give her some time to be with her friends and be absent for a bit. You'll see her true colors and what she really wants, even if she doesn't say anything. Honestly, she shouldn't keep her friends and her boyfriend separate from each other. If you're really a part of her life, she'd involve you in everything.
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